Financing in the middle of a seperation??

[tyka]

Hi there,

My 2003 van is starting to shut down on me and i am thinking it is time to bite the bullet and get a new vehichle. The 2009 CRV is nice and the finance rates are attractive (0.9%) so my question is...i am in the middle of a seperation from my husband and before we "physically" seperate (move out of the house...it is sold) should i try to finance it or should i wait until i am out on my own. I only work P/T but when we are in seperate residences, he will be paying me child support and spousal support on top of my PT income. I don't want his name on the vehicle but some people are telling me i should do it now as it "looks" like i am still married. Do you know what i mean?

I am confused on what is the best thing to do.

[Dina_E]

removed

[TripleHelix]

It's a valid question, although I have no idea what the correct answer is.

[coriolis]

Might want to talk to a lawyer....

[DrXenon]

Separated women typically experience a marked drop in lifestyle; you may want to reconsider a brand new car. When you apply, you will have to succeed on the merit of your own financial situation since your ex is not likely to sign as a co-applicant.

[Nutchos]

If the only thing left between the two of you is moving out then you probably won't be able to put "married" on a finance application anyway. In terms of what the salesperson at the dealership thinks of your marital status, I don't think it matters at all subjectively.

[boyoflondon]

Dropping $30k on a car while working PT and getting spousal support?!?!



To me, the math would NOT add up .... unless you are raping your ex for substantial sum of money each month.

[COSMIC5]

Separated women typically experience a marked drop in lifestyle; you may want to reconsider a brand new car. When you apply, you will have to succeed on the merit of your own financial situation since your ex is not likely to sign as a co-applicant.


They do?

[Anonymouse]

They do?

Divorced women experience a 37% family income drop after they drive their husbands away, in the US at least.

[weedb0y]

If this is the only thing you can think about after such a situation in your life, then I really do wonder about your priorities in life.

How about you live with the 2003 (fairly new, I was expecting 1989), and save up for your child's future? Since you only have a P/T job.

A new car will not fill the void of a divorce in your life. It can only make you and your 'friends' happy in the short term. Instead, this energy can be spent on figuring out what went wrong and how to avoid that in the future. (or even mend the situation, if it is possible that is).

http://marriageandfamilies.byu.edu/issues/2003/January/divorce.aspx

3. What Can Be the Impact of Divorce on Children?
It is obvious that a large number of children of divorced parents survive the experience and later become capable and stable adults. But it is also becoming increasingly evident that many children of divorce are at risk for developing detrimental behaviors, personality disorders, and disruptive lifestyles. Some of the variables in adjustment of children to parental divorce are (1) age of child at divorce, (2) amount of conflict in the marriage, (3) access to both parents after the divorce, (4) adjustment to a step-parent, if there is one, and (5) access to other nurturing adults during the childhood years.


Each year, over 1 million American children suffer the divorce of their parents; moreover, half of the children born this year to parents who are married will see their parents divorce before they turn 18. Mounting evidence in social science journals demonstrates that the devastating physical, emotional, and financial effects that divorce is having on these children will last well into adulthood and affect future generations. Among these broad and damaging effects are the following:

• Children whose parents have divorced are increasingly the victims of abuse. They exhibit more health, behavioral, and emotional problems, are involved more frequently in crime and drug abuse, and have higher rates of suicide.
• Children of divorced parents perform more poorly in reading, spelling, and math. They are also more likely to repeat a grade and to have higher dropout rates and lower rates of college graduation.
• Families with children that were not poor before the divorce see their income drop as much as 50 percent. Almost 50 percent of the parents with children that are going through a divorce move into poverty after the divorce.
• Religious worship, which has been linked to better health, longer marriages, and better family life, drops after the parents’ divorce.10
The divorce of parents, even if it is amicable, tears apart the fundamental unit of American society.11


There are two other similar myths about divorce:


Two faulty beliefs provide the foundation for our current attitudes towards divorce. The first holds that if the parents are happier the children will be happier, too…. Children are not considered separately from their parents; their needs, and even their thoughts are subsumed under the adult agenda…. Indeed, many adults who are trapped in very unhappy marriages would be surprised to learn that their children are relatively content. They don’t care if mom and dad sleep in different beds as long as the family is together….


A second myth is based on the premise that divorce is a temporary crisis that exerts its more harmful effects on parents and children at the time of the breakup.…The belief that the crisis is temporary underlies the notion that if acceptable legal arrangements for custody, visits, and child support are made at the time of the divorce and parents are provided with a few lectures, the child will soon be fine. It is a view we have fervently embraced and continue to hold. But it’s misguided.12

[COSMIC5]

Divorced women experience a 37% family income drop after they drive their husbands away, in the US at least.

So, way less then half in the US. This is why its important to have an education so if and when something happens, you are not devistated -you'll have your own career to support you - and not have to rely on a man for support. Who's to say they drive the men away...perhaps its the other way around? hmmmmm?

I would, if it were me...choose a vehicle that can be paid on your own income and not the spousal nor child support which could end at some point, then where are u?

[t_moss]

http://www.gailvazoxlade.com/splitsville.htm

make sure you're taking care of your credit score. there's no reason why you shouldnt qualify for financing if your credit score is healthy.

If you've filed separation papers, then you're on your own credit-wise. i think it's smart to separate your finances when you're separating...if his name is on the car, it's his too.

[ratface]

Not sure if you are still considering this decision OP, but you may not even be eligible for a loan until your house closes. Assuming you will be applying for credit by yourself (not getting your soon-to-be-ex to co-sign your new car) then the bank will look at only your income, but any joint debts will be considered all yours. So in considering whether you have the ability to repay the car loan, they will assume that you make the full mortgage payments on your matrimonial home. And if you don't have a formal separation agreement yet, then you would only have the PT employment income, and not the support.

So you'll probably have to wait.