Is it ok for parents to get drunk in front of their kids?

[brute33]

I was at a holiday party a few months ago and the hosts have 4 kids from ages 8-12. One of the hosts proceeded to get really drunk all the while his kids were seeing his behaviour. All the adults at this party were in their 30's and all were married with some of them bringing their own kids as well.

[leafs]

Could happen to the best of us. Just hope when it happens someone doesn't start a poll question about it :)

[NorthYorker]

I answered "No", although seriousness of this slip of judgement depends on one's behaviour when drunk. I mean, if you drink one too many and fall asleep on the couch (or even the floor) it's different from drunk brawl, for example.

[brute33]

I answered "No", although seriousness of this slip of judgement depends on one's behaviour when drunk. I mean, if you drink one too many and fall asleep on the couch (or even the floor) it's different from drunk brawl, for example.

agreed. Some are happy drunks. some are mean drunks. some just slow down. this guy was obnoxious and offended several people. The party ended early because of his behaviour...

[bubble.tea]

GASP.

Is this a real poll?

I don't know where this world is going? Who finds this latest Bill (can't recall if it is US or Canada) that is trying to make it illegal to smoke in a vehicle with a minor? Nevermind we KNOW for a fact that smoking is hazardous to your health...we STILL permit it to be sold legally. We're NOT prohibiting the entire sale of tobacco, but ONLY prohibiting the USE in a vehicle with children.

While I find this commendable, I think it is too little. What about HOMES where people smoke and raise their children therein? What consequences does THAT have on their health (redundant Q-as we equally know the long-term health impacts of THAT household environment).

Now it's the same with alchohol. Shucks. I wonder what the statistics say about children who grow up in an alchohol-friendly household vs. those alchohol-unfriendly, and how their outlook on it is as adults, or more importantly as late teens/Young Adults is :(.

It's very sad imho.

Can you guess-I've NEVER had a sip in my life. I have ONLY bad stories to share about my friends who do drink, about friends who've worked in their parents Bars, and moreso about friends who've been in accidents as a result of drinking.

You're STRONGEST teaching tools as parents is ACTIONS-not words. No MATTER WHAT you tell them, you aren't in the army. You can't say "Do as I SAY, not as I DO". These children will become MORE and MORE desensitized to just how BAD drinking, and getting drunk really is and one day will just become their parent(s).

[brute33]

GASP.

Is this a real poll?



yes. this was the 1st time i saw a parent get stupid drunk in front of his kids. I've seen adults get drunk at weddings and that's where i'm on the fence on this issue. But this adult I'm talking about was out of control (rude/insulting/offending). I was really shocked by the situation. But I do not have kids yet and just wanted to know what others thought.

[bubble.tea]

yes. this was the 1st time i saw a parent get stupid drunk in front of his kids. I've seen adults get drunk at weddings and that's where i'm on the fence on this issue. But this adult I'm talking about was out of control (rude/insulting/offending). I was really shocked by the situation. But I do not have kids yet and just wanted to know what others thought.

WOW.

I didn't realize that. Bloody Hell. That's borderline criminal? What were the reactions of OTHER parents there with their children?

Sounds like someone of low moral upbringing imho. So sad.

[Jucius Maximus]

I think it is not OK, unless their kids are also adults.

My mom and I get drunk together from time to time, but if I was 15 or something, it would not be appropriate for my parents to get drunk in front of me.

When your kids are in that teenage phase especially, it is the parents' job to teach them responsible attitudes about alcohol. In my opinion, parents should be providing controlled amounts of alcohol and allowing the teens to drink under close supervision so that the teen learns responsibility. This way the teens learn normal attitudes toward alcohol and they don't treat it as a forbidden thing, thus they are less likely to sneak it or abuse it.

Getting drunk in front of your kids is counterproductive.

[bubble.tea]

I think it is not OK, unless their kids are also adults.

My mom and I get drunk together from time to time, but if I was 15 or something, it would not be appropriate for my parents to get drunk in front of me.

When your kids are in that teenage phase especially, it is the parents' job to teach them responsible attitudes about alcohol. In my opinion, parents should be providing controlled amounts of alcohol and allowing the teens to drink under close supervision so that the teen learns responsibility. This way the teens learn normal attitudes toward alcohol and they don't treat it as a forbidden thing, thus they are less likely to sneak it or abuse it.

Getting drunk in front of your kids is counterproductive.
so you speak of drinking responsibly. Is getting drunk-drinking responsibly? If the only outcome of getting drunk is a myriad possilbe BAD outcomes? I should think anybody will equate getting drunk with drinking IResponsibly.

[Bullseye]

My parents were always drunk when I was a kid, I just thought it was normal. Then again, I was smoking pot with my mom at 17 as well. They had what you might call a 'laid back' parenting style. I wonder if that has anything to do with why 3 out of 4 of us kids didn't finish high school (me being the one). :-0

Myself as a parent now, I don't ever want to be drunk in front of my kids. Moderate social drinking I see no problem with, though. To me it's better for kids to learn that drinking alcohol in moderation and in a social capacity (wine with dinner, beer on the deck at the cottage, etc), than to never be exposed to it at all.

[leafs]

so you speak of drinking responsibly. Is getting drunk-drinking responsibly? If the only outcome of getting drunk is a myriad possilbe BAD outcomes? I should think anybody will equate getting drunk with drinking IResponsibly.

Drinking does not always have a bad outcome. There is such a thing as being responsible when drinking. Who knows what is going on in this guy’s life? Maybe stressed at work? Who knows? We all make mistakes. Sometimes it is with alcohol abuse or inappropriate behavior.

[CodecX81]

Drink? sure.. Loosen up after a hard weeks work and get away from the kids for a few hours..

But get inebriated..? Is that even necessary?

Say that you are your mid-to-late 30s or something.. I think that you are entitled to fun, and a night out with a few drinks.. but You are an adult and should act like a responsible parent both in their presence and out of it.

I think at that age, if you drank enough to be unable to drive safely... you've had too much already.

[bubble.tea]

Interesting question:

Being a parent means..

1) Doing things one way in front of your children...and doing other things DIFFERENTLY behind them?

2) Doing things uniformly irregardless of whether your children are directly in front of you or not.

Your private life (THESE days especially) is no longer private, and can become public knowledge QUITE easily. What would your response be to your children who learned that you were arrested for soliciation, drunk driving, Assault, Theft....ALL acts that you had NEVER done 'in front of' your children :rolleyes:. PLEASE, being a RESPONSIBLE and PRODUCTIVE parent means a lot more than responsible drinking, or monitored Narcotics meddling.

[UrbanPoet]

yeah... thats bad...
Im not a parent... But i was always an advocate of showing kids @ a young age that drinking (and many other things) should be done responsibly and within reason.

that way when they are older, they wont make a big deal about it and binge.

[leafs]

Interesting question:

Being a parent means..

1) Doing things one way in front of your children...and doing other things DIFFERENTLY behind them?

2) Doing things uniformly irregardless of whether your children are directly in front of you or not.

Your private life (THESE days especially) is no longer private, and can become public knowledge QUITE easily. What would your response be to your children who learned that you were arrested for soliciation, drunk driving, Assault, Theft....ALL acts that you had NEVER done 'in front of' your children :rolleyes:. PLEASE, being a RESPONSIBLE and PRODUCTIVE parent means a lot more than responsible drinking, or monitored Narcotics meddling.

Why are you comparing illegal acts to drinking? If someone chooses to drink it does not make them irresponsible and not productive. You obviously have an issue with drinking and that is fine but you shouldn't look down your nose at others that choose to drink. You need to watch it when you are on the morale high ground pointing out others faults because no one is perfect including me and you.

[bigkyle]

why is this such a big debate? Whether you like it or not usually your kids will NOT find out about drinking/drugs from their parents first. I do believe in good upbringing but you can only keep them from so much. A mean drunk nobody likes but for this poll to be made seems kind of dumb, I mean.. the kids will grow older and find out anyways

[bubble.tea]

Why are you comparing illegal acts to drinking? If someone chooses to drink it does not make them irresponsible and not productive. You obviously have an issue with drinking and that is fine but you shouldn't look down your nose at others that choose to drink. You need to watch it when you are on the morale high ground pointing out others faults because no one is perfect including me and you.

Point taken, thank you for humbling me>:(.

I would like to point out however, that I was specifically discussing Drinking vis-a-vis Drunk Driving...not in general.

[kcorscadden]

A parent must lead by example.

A parent has no problem at all for ripping their kids for being drunk at a party and acting like an ass. However, if a parent does it, this is ok? If you think that being drunk in front of your kids is ok then you can't rip them when they get drunk too. They are simply just doing what they saw you do and they thought it was ok.

Once a child gets older (into their 20's) it is ok IMO to get drunk, but not stupid drunk. Usually, by that age, you have instilled your values into them and they should understand that you are having a good time. At a young age, this would have a huge influence as they don't yet understand the reason behind it.

Your actions have a HUGE influence on how your kids view you and react in the future. You are basically on stage 24/7, and whether you realize it or not, your kids see or hear everything that you do.

[BlueMax]

I'm against alcoholism and drunkenness. Period. Why a person feels they need to ruin themselves with alcohol to have a good time and "loosen up" is beyond me.

My mom would get drunk and be loud, stupid and obnoxious. When I was in my early 20's and (of course) knew everything, I got drunk on a few occasions. For the most part, I didn't like it. dizziness, losing control of my better judgment and/or barfing later just wasn't fun.

I guess people will always continue to do stupid things. Guys drink beer because society tells them from an early age, "guys drink beer". You have to acquire the taste for it - it's pretty gross stuff, yet guys drink it because a guy who doesn't like beer is just a weeeeeirdoooooo. Herd mentality. Orwell would call it GroupThink.

[Xax]

I have to admit, I'm surprised it took so long for some fool to add their worthless 2 cents to this thread (just thought I'd add that I'm not refering to the previous post, in case anyone got that impression). Overall, I'm glad most people in this thread are sensible. I can't help but feel bad for those kids.

[Canucklehead]

Only thing that stops me from getting drunk in front of the kids is the question "What if something happened and my kids needed me but I was too drunk to respond"? Example: kids hurts themselves and need an ambulance or house is on fire". Ya ya how often does that happen but I would hate for it to happen just once!

[Diamondog]

How do you drink one too many? You either get drunk or you don't. Unless it's your first time getting drunk and you don't know what your tolerance is thats a pretty lame excuse "I just had one too many ooops". You are the example for your children period. Thats not an example I'd want to set for my child even once in a while....Thats the great thing about being an adult, we are supposed to have some control and common sense!

[brute33]

I'm against alcoholism and drunkenness. Period.

Guys drink beer because society tells them from an early age, "guys drink beer". You have to acquire the taste for it - it's pretty gross stuff, yet guys drink it because a guy who doesn't like beer is just a weeeeeirdoooooo. Herd mentality. Orwell would call it GroupThink.

I agree 100%. i'm 32 and i have never liked the taste of beer. When i was a teen and young adult i would drink beer only cause it was cheap and got me drunk but i hated drinking the first few. I do drink wine and make my own batches and also drink hard liquor but i never could enjoy beer.

[synmag]

I'm against alcoholism and drunkenness. Period. Why a person feels they need to ruin themselves with alcohol to have a good time and "loosen up" is beyond me.

My mom would get drunk and be loud, stupid and obnoxious. When I was in my early 20's and (of course) knew everything, I got drunk on a few occasions. For the most part, I didn't like it. dizziness, losing control of my better judgment and/or barfing later just wasn't fun.

I guess people will always continue to do stupid things. Guys drink beer because society tells them from an early age, "guys drink beer". You have to acquire the taste for it - it's pretty gross stuff, yet guys drink it because a guy who doesn't like beer is just a weeeeeirdoooooo. Herd mentality. Orwell would call it GroupThink.

I also agree 100%. However, most people (including me) I think use the term "loosen up" for having a drink or two to help relax and lose some inhibitions (which is fine) instead of "ruin themselves with alcohol"

I wasn't allowed to touch alcohol until well after 14 and I wasn't really interested nor did it make me seek it out elsewhere. I tried beer at a party once and never had more since after a sip or two. I think it's a self esteem thing. I have high self esteem and I was strong enough to not buckle under peer pressure and say I can find better things to do than getting wasted. I've never been drunk but I came close once and I felt bad enough to never want to again. I have been called boring by my coworkers because I don't drink/smoke/do drugs. I don't care and it doesn't bother me.

Given that drinking and getting drunk seems to be the Canadian national pass time I'm actually surprised by the poll results. As for the topic I think it's wrong. Children shouldn't have to see that. But there is nothing I or anyone can do about it. As they say you don't need a license to be a parent. All one can do is avoid these people...if you disagree with it. If you think it's ok....well, join the party.

Cheers.

[D-Roc]

Simply put. If the child is under age in order to legally drink, getting intoxicated is unaccetable as a parent. I would even go so far as if the child is under the age of 16, that you should not drink at all. The only exception should be if both parents are in attendence and only one plans on drinking (not in excess). Since alcohol will impair your judgment how can you properly parent your child while you are drunk or drinking?

[NorthYorker]

usually your kids will NOT find out about drinking/drugs from their parents first. AFAIR I tried alcohol (dweet bubbly) 1st time at home sometime during elementary school years. Same goes for my wife. It did not make us alcoholics (I think it actually had an opposite effect, alcohol tastes so gross to kids, they'll be turned off for years after every attempt to try it).