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View Full Version : Should I send a cheque to a close friend whose wedding i can't attend ?


canabiz
Jul 3rd, 2006, 11:29 AM
I received the invitation for a wedding next month for a close friend of mine (i have known her since university, about 5 years now, we have gone different paths since but still meet up occasionally)

I will be out of the country at the time so what's the etiquette here folks ? Should i put a cheque in the mail and letting her know that I won't be able to make it ? She knows i won't be able to make it anyway but i guess a gift would be nice ? or it's not necessary

I might add that I will invite her to my own reception later on this year.

Thanks.

zegerman
Jul 3rd, 2006, 11:34 AM
If you consider her a close friend then yes I would. If not money then a gift of some sort, she's probably registered somewhere like the bay or sears. Go online and pick something out on her registry.

UrbanPoet
Jul 3rd, 2006, 11:38 AM
:arrowu:
send a check... she'll pop up the envelope and think "oh cool... 50!" or brownie if you da man.
Give her a call the day before just to say whatsup, g'luck, and congrats =)

Nhiem
Jul 3rd, 2006, 12:58 PM
I think it'd be nicer if you meet up with her and give it to her then (in a nice asian red lucky bag ;)).

keanefan
Jul 3rd, 2006, 01:47 PM
if she is Asian, Italian, South Asian- you can send her money.

But how much?

If she is Caucasian/white- she might consider a cash gift to be tacky.

almostfreeman
Jul 3rd, 2006, 01:50 PM
if she is Asian, Italian, South Asian- you can send her money.

But how much?

If she is Caucasian/white- she might consider a cash gift to be tacky.

O cmon .... cash is king ! I heard whitey's like it too!

SMARTT
Jul 3rd, 2006, 01:50 PM
I received the invitation for a wedding next month for a close friend of mine (i have known her since university, about 5 years now, we have gone different paths since but still meet up occasionally)

I will be out of the country at the time so what's the etiquette here folks ? Should i put a cheque in the mail and letting her know that I won't be able to make it ? She knows i won't be able to make it anyway but i guess a gift would be nice ? or it's not necessary

I might add that I will invite her to my own reception later on this year.

Thanks.

I would... for SURE!!

SMARTT
Jul 3rd, 2006, 01:51 PM
btw guys what is the going rate for a Lunch wedding - Asian!!!

$150 for couple?

mikel2211
Jul 3rd, 2006, 02:43 PM
If she is a close friend I would send cash or a gift card for where ever they have a wedding registry.

canabiz
Jul 3rd, 2006, 03:08 PM
I'm thinking of writing a cheque for $75 what do you guys think ?

She invites 2 of us to come, if we were to come we would give her $150 for sure but since we are not coming, do you think $75 sounds about right ?

SMARTT
Jul 3rd, 2006, 03:11 PM
If she is a close friend I would send cash or a gift card for where ever they have a wedding registry.

is a gift card the same kind of gift as Cash!?

SMARTT
Jul 3rd, 2006, 03:11 PM
I'm thinking of writing a cheque for $75 what do you guys think ?

She invites 2 of us to come, if we were to come we would give her $150 for sure but since we are not coming, do you think $75 sounds about right ?


$80 sounds fine for asian.. #8!

M@rk
Jul 3rd, 2006, 03:48 PM
I dunno, I think a cheque might be a little impersonal. Most people tend to just give cash for these occasions. If you put the money inside an envelope within an envelope, and then a little letter around it, the postal workers won't know it's money :razz:

Sparkx
Jul 3rd, 2006, 04:23 PM
Does the invite mention "Wishing Well" or "Gifts"? if it says Wishing Well, it means she is asking for money.
$75 is more than fine. NEVER SEND CASH IN THE MAIL!!

gman
Jul 3rd, 2006, 04:32 PM
$80 sounds fine for asian.. #8!

For a wedding, as Chinese, you may want 9. 9 represents last long ... implies forever.

x86asm
Jul 3rd, 2006, 04:39 PM
I dunno, I think a cheque might be a little impersonal. Most people tend to just give cash for these occasions. If you put the money inside an envelope within an envelope, and then a little letter around it, the postal workers won't know it's money :razz:
I just want to comment on this trick, I have used it before and it works. It goes there intact.

yuwing8
Jul 3rd, 2006, 05:05 PM
just send 100.

canabiz
Jul 3rd, 2006, 05:11 PM
just send 100.

Hmm i think that might be a lil bit much. I am flying to Korea to have my own wedding there, i certainly need some space, budget-wise. I think $75 will do for me and my girl here.

gman
Jul 3rd, 2006, 05:28 PM
Hmm i think that might be a lil bit much. I am flying to Korea to have my own wedding there, i certainly need some space, budget-wise. I think $75 will do for me and my girl here.

In that case, send in the cheque with a return envelope so that she can send you a cheque too. ;)